Yule
Erin posted that she was feeling peace this Christmas season. It was a nice post, and one whose sentiments I can usually echo in my own way at this time of year. Not the case this year.
The fact is that I have an internal struggle born of a loving gesture that I am having difficulty sorting out. You see my mother has encouraged the entire family to acknowledge Yule this year. At least in respect to the fact that it is the holiday that I celebrate. Everybody has jumped right on board with this idea. Thinking that since I celebrate Christmas with the family every year, the least they can do is give a token acknowledgement in return. Even I am mostly cool with this idea. Mostly.
You see, the whole family is planning on giving me the bulk of my gifts three days before Christmas. Take note kids. Become Pagan and get your toys quicker. Its good for adults too, find out what you got for the holidays so you know how much to spend in return.
Seriously, though, I have been wrestling with several issues with this. One of them being the concept that as it has been orchestrated for this year, each of our family members will be receiving gifts on their particular holiday. Receiving gifts. On these two holidays of giving, we will all be receiving our gifts on the right day, and giving on the other one.
I had thought for a moment that this was a great idea, then began wondering if it was in fact a sign of losing sight of the intention of the season. Re-orchestratring when it is that you got a bunch of gifts you didn't earn. This led me to an even greater horror, confirmed by talks of family dinner and gathering together on the Saturday in question.
This year, the Solstice wouldn't just be another day like in years past to my family. It wasn't going to be a ten minute gathering with my parents and my wife each giving me a gift when I came home from working late. A surprise, since I would have bet the former hadn't known what date it was. This was going to be a full blown holiday style family gathering/event.
Why is this bad? Isn't this what the season is about? Well, yes, it is. However, I have always taken advantage of the fact that nobody notices Yule, nobody gathers or makes it any big deal, and there isn't this huge commercial thing going on around it. It is just a quiet day where I can reflect on the year, I can pray, and focus on the year to come. I could set goals and measure how well I met the previous year's goals. It has been a peaceful, solitary, spiritual day.
I can't help but wonder if that might be lost in the craziness of a holiday now noticed. If we will simply be turning Christmas with our family into a week long event. I wonder if Yule will be one more day that was once a private time between the Goddess and I in which She will slowly fade out of the picture.
Of course, none of the family's plans for this year will cause any of that. It was merely the catalyst for the thought process. Still, it is a thing to think about for me this season. In all of the craziness and all of the points on our holiday itineraries, I need to make it a point to remember what this season is about. Then I will return to a holiday version of life, or something close to it.
The fact is that I have an internal struggle born of a loving gesture that I am having difficulty sorting out. You see my mother has encouraged the entire family to acknowledge Yule this year. At least in respect to the fact that it is the holiday that I celebrate. Everybody has jumped right on board with this idea. Thinking that since I celebrate Christmas with the family every year, the least they can do is give a token acknowledgement in return. Even I am mostly cool with this idea. Mostly.
You see, the whole family is planning on giving me the bulk of my gifts three days before Christmas. Take note kids. Become Pagan and get your toys quicker. Its good for adults too, find out what you got for the holidays so you know how much to spend in return.
Seriously, though, I have been wrestling with several issues with this. One of them being the concept that as it has been orchestrated for this year, each of our family members will be receiving gifts on their particular holiday. Receiving gifts. On these two holidays of giving, we will all be receiving our gifts on the right day, and giving on the other one.
I had thought for a moment that this was a great idea, then began wondering if it was in fact a sign of losing sight of the intention of the season. Re-orchestratring when it is that you got a bunch of gifts you didn't earn. This led me to an even greater horror, confirmed by talks of family dinner and gathering together on the Saturday in question.
This year, the Solstice wouldn't just be another day like in years past to my family. It wasn't going to be a ten minute gathering with my parents and my wife each giving me a gift when I came home from working late. A surprise, since I would have bet the former hadn't known what date it was. This was going to be a full blown holiday style family gathering/event.
Why is this bad? Isn't this what the season is about? Well, yes, it is. However, I have always taken advantage of the fact that nobody notices Yule, nobody gathers or makes it any big deal, and there isn't this huge commercial thing going on around it. It is just a quiet day where I can reflect on the year, I can pray, and focus on the year to come. I could set goals and measure how well I met the previous year's goals. It has been a peaceful, solitary, spiritual day.
I can't help but wonder if that might be lost in the craziness of a holiday now noticed. If we will simply be turning Christmas with our family into a week long event. I wonder if Yule will be one more day that was once a private time between the Goddess and I in which She will slowly fade out of the picture.
Of course, none of the family's plans for this year will cause any of that. It was merely the catalyst for the thought process. Still, it is a thing to think about for me this season. In all of the craziness and all of the points on our holiday itineraries, I need to make it a point to remember what this season is about. Then I will return to a holiday version of life, or something close to it.
Labels: Spirituality, Yule
posted by Wanderer at 1:57 PM
5 Comments:
Interesting. initially, I would have thought that you would appreciate family recognizing Yule's significance to you. But now that you say it and I think about it, I do see your point.
With any holiday/holyday it's so easy to lose sight of the deeper meanings when things become more...um, commercialized or complicated or whatever you want to call it.
I think if I were you I'd like to keep Yule to myself too...I'd love it if this time of year I could have a day that's mine...although my birthday is right after Christmas, so I guess you could say that is, but you know what I mean.
So is this something you have wanted to have happen, the family to recognize this holiday for you? Do you WANT to receive your gifts on Yule? If not, maybe you could say so? I don't know, it seems to me like such a nice gesture, maybe you don't want to rock the boat.
Maybe just endure whatever comes of it this year, and next year be specific about how you would like the family to recognize Yule for/with you, if at all.
Thanks for making me think. I hope all the celebrating has meaning for you this year, whatever it might entail.
That's the thing, Erin. It isn't that I mind them recognizing it. I am touched that they have. I guess that is what I was getting at at the end of the post. The question of me allowing or not allowing the significance of the holiday to fall by the wayside does not in fact have anything to do with them at all.
You already pointed out the lessons learned in "Shrek the halls" I guess thinking about the inherent imperfections that pop up as soon as multiple people are celebrating got me a little uncomfortable.
Then again, this may lead to a greater focus, rather than a lesser. Mostly it is just an issue of comfort zones I guess.
It could be a stretching point for you, I imagine. Sharing this with your family...if they in fact want to share your celebration rather than just turn it into another Christmas, would probably be nice for you.
Question...because this still confuses me...what's the difference between Yule and Winter Solstice? Are they different celebrations or the same thing? Would Yule fall this time of year (December)for Pagas in the southern hemisphere...Or do they celebrate Lithia in December and Yule in June?
I guess what I'm asking is is Yule specifically a December Holiday or does it always fall with the Winter Solstice? Because I've heard it explained both ways.
If you want to be left alone on your holidays, turn atheist.
My understanding is that Yule always coincides with the Winter Solstice. It does in the northern hemisphere, and to tell you the truth, I have never spoken to a Pagan in the southern hemisphere. It would seem counterindicative to the celebration for it to happen in the summer, and more sensible for the dates to reverse then the point of the celebration. Of course this would impact all of the celebrations. Definitely something worth looking deeper into. Once again you have piqued my curiosity.
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